So let's start this bad boy off with some linkage.
So, I know it's really cool and trendy to say how much funnier SNL was in the Tina Fey and Will Ferrel golden days, but this is some top notch comedy right here. I remember the day I got an email from my brother with the subject "WTF!!!!!!" in regards to our mothers new Facebook. One of the funnier Facebook moments I can remember was when my friend Julia got "married" on Facebook, and her Grandfather (who also doubles as her Facebook friend) called her parents frantically to find out why no one informed him she was getting married.
It is kind of ridiculous that old people and our parents are getting Facebooks, especially if you think about it with this new perspective we have all acquired from watching the gem of a film that is The Social Network. If you haven't seen it-SEE IT. When I think about the creation of Facebook and Mark Zuckerberg, a number of things come to mind:
1. I first feel completely inferior, because I know nothing that influential will ever come out of my college dormroom.
2. This whole Facebook thing, which has entirely changed the worlds of social communication, photography, advertising, and a million others that I can't think of, started as a drunk dude trying to impress his bros and fuck mad bitties (although Mark Zuckerberg certainly was no bro).
3. Now that our parents, grandparents, grandfathers ex-wives, overbearing aunts, 5th grade crushes, and "that hot kid" from math class are all coexisting on this internet world, what's going to happen to all these people and their Facebook pages? When I am a working professional and have children, will I still somehow have Facebook pictures of my summers at camp and my nights out in college? Will I still be Facebook friends with nearly my entire high school?
Facebook is such a fucking mystery.
Making this link my Facebook status,
G
Sunday, October 17, 2010
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Run and tell that, fellow patriot.
Antoine Dodson, that ridiculous homeboy from the projects, teaches us more about the American Dream than The Great Gatsby.
Before you roll your eyes and close this window, remember that the title of this blog is, after all FAUX intellect. Now hear me out. Antoine Dodson took his 15 minutes of fame, and turned them into millions of youtube hits, facebook friends, tweets, and most importantly PAID downloads on itunes. This conniving motherfucker even somehow maneuvered his way onto The BET Awards the other night, as if he was some sort of genius black performer. In fact, he is just imploring cultural stereotypes and inviting all of America to laugh and him and his idiot sister-- whose rape case no longer matters--because stoned teenagers and bored middle schoolers get to laugh and sing along to their news interview turned autotune anthem.
This ridiculous nonsense turned chart topper, though, is what America is all about. People coming from humble beginnings taking their lives, and turning them into something more extravagant, more affluent, more...autotuned. As my friend Eddie Saviano pointed out, now all the little boys and girls watching The BET Awards can pray that one day if they play their cards right they can warn their sister's rapists that "we gon' find you."
But hell, he fucking did it. I'm sure when he's depositing his royalty checks, he's not too concerned about whether people are laughing with him or at him. It reminds me of the scene in Love Actually when the over the hill rock star Billy Mack is rerecording his hit song, but replacing the word "love" with the ill-fitting and overly cheesy "Christmas." Mack turns to his manager, and tells him that he thinks the new version is shit, after which, his manager replies "solid gold shit!" Antoine Dodson is making virtual, viral, gold shit.
Courtesy of the one and only Michal Meer, here's Antoine Dodson's BET performance. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNky6v2ZSNI
Climbing in your windows and snatching your gold shit up,
G
Before you roll your eyes and close this window, remember that the title of this blog is, after all FAUX intellect. Now hear me out. Antoine Dodson took his 15 minutes of fame, and turned them into millions of youtube hits, facebook friends, tweets, and most importantly PAID downloads on itunes. This conniving motherfucker even somehow maneuvered his way onto The BET Awards the other night, as if he was some sort of genius black performer. In fact, he is just imploring cultural stereotypes and inviting all of America to laugh and him and his idiot sister-- whose rape case no longer matters--because stoned teenagers and bored middle schoolers get to laugh and sing along to their news interview turned autotune anthem.
This ridiculous nonsense turned chart topper, though, is what America is all about. People coming from humble beginnings taking their lives, and turning them into something more extravagant, more affluent, more...autotuned. As my friend Eddie Saviano pointed out, now all the little boys and girls watching The BET Awards can pray that one day if they play their cards right they can warn their sister's rapists that "we gon' find you."
But hell, he fucking did it. I'm sure when he's depositing his royalty checks, he's not too concerned about whether people are laughing with him or at him. It reminds me of the scene in Love Actually when the over the hill rock star Billy Mack is rerecording his hit song, but replacing the word "love" with the ill-fitting and overly cheesy "Christmas." Mack turns to his manager, and tells him that he thinks the new version is shit, after which, his manager replies "solid gold shit!" Antoine Dodson is making virtual, viral, gold shit.
Courtesy of the one and only Michal Meer, here's Antoine Dodson's BET performance. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNky6v2ZSNI
Climbing in your windows and snatching your gold shit up,
G
Tuesday, October 12, 2010
Minaj, Ooh La La.
Anyone who has talked music with me in the last few weeks has heard about my obsession with Nicki Minaj. Nicki, first and foremost, is just plain awesome. She is the type of woman I would never have the gaul to be; every new Nicki verse I hear excites me more than the one before.
Initially, I was disgusted by Nicki. When I heard her verse in Young Money's "Bedrock," in which she explains how she would like to put "this pussy on your sideburns," I a) wanted to vomit, and b) wondered how they let this gross chick roll in the big leagues with the likes of Lil' Wayne and Drake. However, the more Nicki I listen to, the more I fall in love.
The first time I heard Nicki's verse on the godsend of a track "Monster," I knew she was on to something. Her verse makes the song, and that is certainly no easy task considering who else is featured on the track. To be the best in that song means not only knocking Kanye West, Jay Z, and Rick Ross out of the park, but that also means Nicki stole the spotlight from my hipster hearthrob Justin Vernon from Bon Iver, whose collaboration with Kanye had the potential to make my hip hop year. Also, anyone who refers to herself as the "black Hannah Montana" automatically has my undying love and affection.
Minaj not only has clever verses and funny nicknames on her resume; she is pretty damn culturally significant. Nicki is in the running to be one of the more influential females in modern popular culture. Her style is promiscuous and revealing, but there is more to it than that. Nicki brings my two favorite pastimes from Kindergarden, Barbie and pink foofy dresses, and somehow contorts them into risque sexual items fit for a female member of a world-renowned rap crew. The craziest part is Nicki is really good, like really, really good. In an interview with the famous New York radio station Hot 97 this summer, Kanye West explained that Nicki is "the scariest artist in the game right now." On her mixtape "Beam Me Up Scotty," Nicki proves Kanye right.
"Beam Me Up Scotty" is a great mix of songs you've heard before (Go Hard ft Lil Wayne and Best I Ever Had ft Drake), songs you've probably never heard before, and Nicki's life musings and commentary. In "Still I Rise," Nicki Minaj spends the opening verse referring to herself in the second person, saying things like "I mean she okay/but she ain't all that/ she ain't the next bitch/tell that bitch fall back" and "you know her last name Minaj/she's a lesbian." Then, of course, Nicki explains that "still I rise." Nicki also explains that she is in fact paving the way for future "real bitches," because "real if
"Nicki wins then all of ya'll gettin' meetings." Nicki knows she's good, knows she's making it, and that pretty soon--perhaps when her album Pink Friday drops on November 23--her haters will be entirely irrelevant.
Nicki's fuck the haters attitude, ridiculous attire, and overall rogue demeanor are clearly inspired by America's favorite free bitch, Lady Gaga. On Beam Me Up Scotty, when Nicki explains how she is "relevant in a world of irrelevant bitches" and encourages her fans to "be a bad bitch, never be a stupid bitch." Nicki, on Twitter, refers to her fans as "Barbz" and "Kens," much like Gaga's little monsters. Gaga has created a cultlike following of males and females both gay and straight, because she is just so crazy and convincing; she has created an empire for herself based mostly off shock value (and her undeniable talent).
Nicki is hip hop's Lady Gaga. She is shocking, she is crazy, she is a little much--but she has it. She has the brilliant social commentary lyrics; "my money's so tall that my Barbies couldn't climb it" is undeniably awesome. She is relevant and a bad bitch and she knows it.
Eagerly awaiting the day Nicki and Gaga collaborate,
G
Initially, I was disgusted by Nicki. When I heard her verse in Young Money's "Bedrock," in which she explains how she would like to put "this pussy on your sideburns," I a) wanted to vomit, and b) wondered how they let this gross chick roll in the big leagues with the likes of Lil' Wayne and Drake. However, the more Nicki I listen to, the more I fall in love.
The first time I heard Nicki's verse on the godsend of a track "Monster," I knew she was on to something. Her verse makes the song, and that is certainly no easy task considering who else is featured on the track. To be the best in that song means not only knocking Kanye West, Jay Z, and Rick Ross out of the park, but that also means Nicki stole the spotlight from my hipster hearthrob Justin Vernon from Bon Iver, whose collaboration with Kanye had the potential to make my hip hop year. Also, anyone who refers to herself as the "black Hannah Montana" automatically has my undying love and affection.
Minaj not only has clever verses and funny nicknames on her resume; she is pretty damn culturally significant. Nicki is in the running to be one of the more influential females in modern popular culture. Her style is promiscuous and revealing, but there is more to it than that. Nicki brings my two favorite pastimes from Kindergarden, Barbie and pink foofy dresses, and somehow contorts them into risque sexual items fit for a female member of a world-renowned rap crew. The craziest part is Nicki is really good, like really, really good. In an interview with the famous New York radio station Hot 97 this summer, Kanye West explained that Nicki is "the scariest artist in the game right now." On her mixtape "Beam Me Up Scotty," Nicki proves Kanye right.
"Beam Me Up Scotty" is a great mix of songs you've heard before (Go Hard ft Lil Wayne and Best I Ever Had ft Drake), songs you've probably never heard before, and Nicki's life musings and commentary. In "Still I Rise," Nicki Minaj spends the opening verse referring to herself in the second person, saying things like "I mean she okay/but she ain't all that/ she ain't the next bitch/tell that bitch fall back" and "you know her last name Minaj/she's a lesbian." Then, of course, Nicki explains that "still I rise." Nicki also explains that she is in fact paving the way for future "real bitches," because "real if
"Nicki wins then all of ya'll gettin' meetings." Nicki knows she's good, knows she's making it, and that pretty soon--perhaps when her album Pink Friday drops on November 23--her haters will be entirely irrelevant.
Nicki's fuck the haters attitude, ridiculous attire, and overall rogue demeanor are clearly inspired by America's favorite free bitch, Lady Gaga. On Beam Me Up Scotty, when Nicki explains how she is "relevant in a world of irrelevant bitches" and encourages her fans to "be a bad bitch, never be a stupid bitch." Nicki, on Twitter, refers to her fans as "Barbz" and "Kens," much like Gaga's little monsters. Gaga has created a cultlike following of males and females both gay and straight, because she is just so crazy and convincing; she has created an empire for herself based mostly off shock value (and her undeniable talent).
Nicki is hip hop's Lady Gaga. She is shocking, she is crazy, she is a little much--but she has it. She has the brilliant social commentary lyrics; "my money's so tall that my Barbies couldn't climb it" is undeniably awesome. She is relevant and a bad bitch and she knows it.
Eagerly awaiting the day Nicki and Gaga collaborate,
G
Monday, October 11, 2010
It's all about connections.
Blogging may be the most pretentious trend of the 21st century, or at least a close second to tweeting. Anyone can come up with an idea or brilliant series of epiphanies that they so desperately need to share with the world. However, being the young idealistic college student I am, I for some reason have the notion that my rants, raves and ridiculous ideas are rare pearls of wisdom, or at least worthy of your eyes as your facebook-alternative procrastination tool.
SO, that being said, my earth-shattering, transcendent blueprint for this blog is to write about all the random ideas I pair together and why. If you dabble in popular culture, enjoy high brow references, the occasional obnoxious comment and maybe a witty pun here and there, you've come to the right place in cyberspace.
Love from a semi-ironic macbook,
G
SO, that being said, my earth-shattering, transcendent blueprint for this blog is to write about all the random ideas I pair together and why. If you dabble in popular culture, enjoy high brow references, the occasional obnoxious comment and maybe a witty pun here and there, you've come to the right place in cyberspace.
Love from a semi-ironic macbook,
G
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